Too bad

I've got a lot of things going through my mind. A lot has happened and a lot is still going on to happen. But certain things are not going to happen anyways. Too bad. When I get too excited about something, it doesn't happen. Things do not always go according to plan and I need to let go of having things come out my way. Wouldn't it be nice if there were a way to fast forward past my pain? Just press a button and speed up time to a point where I feel more balanced and rational. I hope you guys had a good day because I didn't. Something just doesn't seem quite right...

15 things money can't buy for me...

1. Marrying someone, a lovely, a genius, an understanding, and no-need-to-be-that-handsome husband and… sleeping right next to someone I truly love.

2. Getting a second chance.

3. Someone dedicates “Marry your daughter” to my father or to me.

5. Eat and eat but never gain weight. Who wants to look ike an ugly monster in her wedding gown?

7. Surrounded by kind-hearted people- A sweet and down-to-earth mom, a soft-spoken-and-know-just-the-right-thing-to-say and generous-hearted dad, kaklong, abang long, angah, kak wani, uncles, aunties, close friends.

8. waking up after having a great dream, realizing its weekend and curling up for another 45 minutes of sleep.

9. Someone tells me “yes” when I expected them to say “no” or being called beautiful when I’m not wearing any make up or fancy clothes.

10. Seeing two elderly folks who are madly in love- atok and nenek and seeing the person who makes my heart race even if it’s just for a few seconds or seeing someone else laugh hysterically.

11. I’m not a good cook so when I cook something and everyone likes it. It makes me happy!

12. The look on my parents face when I make them proud.

13. Getting a creative, well thought out gift, rather than an ordinary one, especially from the special one.

14. Looking into the eyes of my best friend and know, without a doubt, that I can trust her. Yeap, I can trust and trust her.

15. Last but not least, go on a date. Seretly! :p

25 lessons

Hello.

This week I've just going through the motions, and it makes me thinking... how many times this week have I remembered to slow down and breathe and put myself and my need first? And I realized, life is not normal anymore...

Well, normal is a scam. Doesn’t exist!

Think about all the things I would love to tell myself if I could travel back in time to give my younger self some advice about life. I wish I knew... And there are 25 lessons I learned by age 25.

1. My family is my everything.

2. We don't know when we will fall sick or die or get married. What I want to say is, just be good and kind to others. If you hate some people, just let them go and don't hurt their feeling. We don't know when we or that person will die.

3. Don't wait for people to smile. Show them how.

4. Help an elderly person carry something.

5. Time heals all wounds, regardless of how I feel right now.

6. Most of the time, what I'm looking for is right in front of me.

7. People deserve a second chance. Not a third. Not a forth.

8. If I want to feel rich, just count all the great things I have that money can't buy.

9. I don't need a certain number of friends, just a number of friends I can be certain of.

10. Negativity breeds more negativity.

11. If I want love, I give love. If I want friends, I need to be friendly. And if I want money, I provide value. It is simple.

12. Appreciate people the way they are.

13. Offer my seat to someone when there aren't any left.

14. Do a little something extra to make someone's life easier.

15. Use all the manners I learned at home.

16. Give without expecting to get back.

17. Excel at what I do. People appreciate professionals.

18. Its okay to be angry. Its never okay to be cruel.

19.Money and stuff are not all that important. It gets old fast, So feed our soul, not our ego.

20. Good looks attract the eyes. Personality attracts the heart.

21. Relationship should help you, not hurt you. Spend time with nice people who are smart, driven and like-minded.

22. All I know is that when it comes to losing, I've mastered the art, Back then, I was convinced a handsome prince would find me. Every little girl knows the story how the prince met Cinderella. I never questioned the possibility of my life not being filled with sweet lollipops. *cause I'm sweet, as sweet as lollipop. :p* I realize I don't need a handsome prince to rescue me. And I will love again. Believe!

23. Have a little fun while I can.

24. I'm lucky to be in field where I think for a living.

25. I love the way I am.

My story was never read. It had missing pieces and I've skipped lines I should have said but were too afraid to say...

Why?

I'll never know....

Till then, bye!